For Pete's Sake, Don't Drop the Soap

I don't know when it started, but I'd miss it if it were gone.

When I started dating Joe, over a year ago, I was struck by how...well...wholesome he was. He's *that guy* you want to take home to your mom. The one who says the right thing, who knows which fork is for what at fancy restaurants, and the one who can recite all the presidents we've had.

But he's also a goof.

A funny guy with a persistence unlike anyone else I've ever met when it comes to making me laugh. That's right. If I laugh once about something, you can believe that he'll make the same joke again and again until it loses it's funny. Which isn't to say that he is a one-trick pony. No. This guy is super witty and we joke about different stuff all of the time. It's just he's smart enough to know when a joke works.

And truly, I don't know when it started, but it's been going on for a while and it still makes me break into giggle fits.

He humps me from behind.

Now, bear with me. This isn't another story about how I got felt up in church or anything like that.

What I mean is that if my back is to him and I happen to have my butt pushed out in some way, he'll pretend to hump me.

The thing is, it cracks me up. To be fair, this only happens when he's in reasonably close proximity (he won't run across the room to "humpity," but if he's close and paying attention, watch out!) and when we're not in the presence of anyone else. AND it's not like he does this all day long. Nope, just a humpity or two in any given week.

I guess what I'm saying is, he doesn't over-use the humpity. Not too much and not too little. The perfect amount of humpity action.

I affix a deadpan look and usually after a few "humpity"s, he'll stop, step aside so he can see my face of complete boredom, and then look all proud of himself - like he's just given me a bunch of flowers. Sometimes he nods emphatically. It's usually then that I burst into laughter.

So, reaching for something on top of the fridge? Humpity.

Brushing my teeth at the sink and bending down to spit out the froth? Humpity.

Stirring something in a pot on the stove? Humpity.

During a long elevator ride? Humpity humpity humpity.

Heaven help me if I bend over to tie my shoe...