IKEA...how I love and hate you...

IKEA...how I love and hate you. You sure are cheap, but boy are you not easy!

First, why are you not in Denver? Why? We're a liberal, fashion forward (fringe is a fashion, right?), and trendy city - what could you possibly be looking for that we don't have?

Secondly, even though I spent time and money to ship your desk to me, why can I not get these 6 damn screws in? Why do you have to be like that?

Thirdly, your instruction manual is not complete...but your illustrations of a little man questioning his ability to read instructions and then calling your store is too cute. I smile when I see it, even if my palm hurts from the screwdriver handle digging into my skin. 

Well, I'll show you. This will work. I will get this desk together one way or another...you'll see, IKEA...you'll see.