IKEA...how I love and hate you...

IKEA...how I love and hate you. You sure are cheap, but boy are you not easy!

First, why are you not in Denver? Why? We're a liberal, fashion forward (fringe is a fashion, right?), and trendy city - what could you possibly be looking for that we don't have?

Secondly, even though I spent time and money to ship your desk to me, why can I not get these 6 damn screws in? Why do you have to be like that?

Thirdly, your instruction manual is not complete...but your illustrations of a little man questioning his ability to read instructions and then calling your store is too cute. I smile when I see it, even if my palm hurts from the screwdriver handle digging into my skin. 

Well, I'll show you. This will work. I will get this desk together one way or another...you'll see, IKEA...you'll see.

Back in the saddle again...

So, I'm finally willing to date again. It's been over six months, but I think that even though I knew I *could* date again, I wasn't ready to really let go and try to trust again.

Last night, I went to go see a friend's band - they're friends that I met through my ex and it was SO great to see them again. Really - it felt like slipping into a comfy sweatshirt - just good, fun, and reminded me of how much I missed them.

Anyway, my friend Mel asked if I had been seeing anyone and of course, I said "I'm seeing you right now!" :) Yeah, not my best material, but how could I not take that bait? :)

Alright, I have been on one date since June - and it was absolutely horrible. You know when you say something funny and the other person just looks at you with this "WTF" expression on their face? Yeah...that was how pretty much the whole date went. Needless to say, there was not another one.

But alas, I digress. So, my friend Mel (and her hubby Chad) are going to set me up with one of their friends. He seems like he'd be a nice guy and he's never been to jail for being a pedophile so I'm guessing it'll be okay. Don't get me wrong, I don't have high hopes, but it's just nice to feel like I'm going to be back out there again. And for now, that's good enough. :)

On a side note, if you know of any single, funny, nice guys you should hook a sista' up! :)

Reason number 4,837 I loved this week...

Okay, I've had some bad times and some stressful times recently, but this week rocked.

First, I got a new computer...and I love love love love love it.

Secondly, I got to see my best friend, Kelly when I flew into Chicago on Friday night (work with me...it's still in this past week). She and I had one of most enjoyable weekends and I even went shopping and bought a super cute computer desk for my new pad at IKEA. For clarification purposes, the pad is not in IKEA, but rather in Denver. :) Anyway, I got a great deal on the desk so we decided to buy it and then ship it home to me for when I arrived today. The FedEx clerk (who may have very well been on several prescription meds that were, most likely, not prescribed to her) clearly didn't care about her job and magically changed the shipping cost from the $250 range to less than $50. She rocked... Throughout the weekend, Kelly and I were able to find the best parking spaces and even got a refill on our cheddar biscuits at Red Lobster! :) Hee hee. Sure, other people had that too, but I know it's because we rocked.

Okay, the best part was that I got to see my two sisters and dad on Sunday. I just got home and it was easily the most enjoyable Christmas with my dad since forever...my grandma's health is not the best, but I think it woke my dad up into realizing that people, not things, are important. It was great and some brought about a closeness that we've all been wanting for a long time. Elizabeth is healing from a recent surgery and is handling things really well all things considered.

Today after flying in, I picked up the pooch and she ran out, literally dragging the worker behind her, to me. Man, I wish I was the caliber of person my dog thinks I am...but alas, I digress.

I came home to a full page of emails from you all wishing me a Merry Christmas.

But the icing on the cake was that I came home to find that I WON (yes, that means I beat them all!!!) my fantasy football league. Sure, you may think that it's mostly chance, but you'd be wrong. It was my mad skills alone (okay, having LT on the team helped a tad) that allowed our team to win. And you should've heard all the razzing I got from the guys at work when I said I wanted to play at the beginning of the season.

2007 may have had some low points, but it appears to be ending on a high note!

What the hell?

Okay - so I will get this out there right now. I stole this from Ginger's blog. It was too funny not to post on mine and share with you. So thanks Ginger...for stealing it from someone else's blog so I could see it. And thanks, God, for making these so frickin' funny. Sure, it's probably a survival technique out in the wild, but it doesn't seem like it'd be very effective. Then again, what do I know? I'm not a goat.

The funniest part is when they do it to a bunch of them at once.

I almost can't stop laughing.

Churches...

Usually I'm not the person that laughs at what someone says. I mean, if they mean it to be funny, I laugh at it...but if they don't, well then I just think it can come off as being mean as if they're teleported back to middle school and countless nightmares where people point and laugh. So I try not to laugh at someone's stupid mistakes or weird quirks...but today I couldn't help it.

A co-worker and I were trying to pass the time during an email outage when we were talking about famous people and our encounters with them.

Wait, let me back up for a moment.

I was really active in my church in Oklahoma - partially because that's what you do in Oklahoma...go to church, get married, and have babies. Some of the time, this all happens before the age of 14, but not always.* Anyway, I had a great time there and when I moved here I figured it'd be a good way to get to know people here.

So I started visiting churches. One day I decided to go to one by my house...it's a HUGE church - about the size of our theatre in Oklahoma City. It was tough to find a parking space even in the lot for easily over 200 cars. Police were directing traffic. Seriously, it had a coffee bar in the atrium, stadium style seating, and even the flippy chair that one might find in a movie theatre. Not really my taste, but I was there and already had on panty hose, so I made the best of it. The preacher came onto the stage and made some big announcement about how they had a special guest that day and I figured that it was some sort of inside thing that only the regulars would understand. Anyway, he says something like, "Welcome, John Tesh!" And I thought "wow - he has the same name as the famous guy...weird." When the big camera depicted on the jumbo screen showed a close up, I realized that it was THE John Tesh. I couldn't believe it. I turned to the person next to me and literally said, "Holy Shit! That's John Tesh!" As you can imagine, my statement wasn't really appreciated. I was a little embarrased because even if you're wearing panty hose, they don't typically like you to curse in church. This story has made others laugh through the years, so it's a good one to tell in a situation such as what came up today.

Remember that a co-worker and I were trying talking about famous people... I mentioned that I had seen John Tesh. My co-worker asked about when/where. So I said "When I first moved here and I was looking for churches-" and I paused because my work phone started ringing. He then said, "Churches Chicken? Did you try the phone book or were you just driving around? Wow. I didn't even know that you liked fried chicken."

And I'm not sure why, but I laughed so hard I almost wet my pants. He felt horrible and although I felt bad because I was clearly laughing at him, I couldn't stop.

He was actually a great sport about it and I think I did an okay job about passing it off about it catching me off guard, but I found it also too funny not to share.

~A

*= For my friends from Oklahoma: I'm kidding. Rex (a friend and an Oklahoman) really was the one that said that it usually happened before 14...so I'm blaming him. :) But it was funny...so I had to steal it and put it in my blog.

Catch up

Okay...I'm saying it. I'm sometimes a bad communicator. When I'm stressed and busy, I suck more about keeping in touch than when I'm not.

So for those that have the time, here's what's new in my life...

1) The house: I got two offers on the same day a couple of weeks ago. This past week, my house passed inspection which means that I should be able to close on November 9th like I'd planned. This would be sheer happiness, but I still haven't found a place to move into yet. I bet I've seen over 70 properties and I have only found one that really *felt* like home. The problem is that I offered what the place is actually worth...and the owner/investor feels like it's worth a lot more. I'd love to have emotion sweep me away on this one so I'd offer more, but the house (although I really love it) just isn't worth that. And I don't want to be not able to sell it later down the road. The big problem is that when I took this new job back in April, it came with a big pay deduction. So I'm doing the responsible thing by decreasing my debt load and my payment. But since I want to also live in Denver where the rest of the young, single, and semi-sane people live, I'm decreasing quite a bit in house. I've come to terms with living in a condo, row home, or half of a duplex...but unfortunately in the areas I'm looking in, they're just not feeling right. Since my offer was not accepted (and they're not going lower than their asking price), I'm off to look at places again today. I'm bummed, but I also know that even if I have to rent for awhile, I hope I'll be able to figure out where I should live.

2. Chassis: For those that don't know, my dog has had some significant health problems lately...she's shaking (almost like she's got Parkinsons) when she sits or lays down. I've had a neurologist look at her and the consensus is that she has hypothyroidism (rare in dogs her age) and that it might stop the tremors. She has been on medication for about 4 weeks and so far no change. But the doctors feel she's not in pain, so we're living with it. :)

3. My health: I've been sick for over a week now and it's not really getting better. I'm not sure what's up, but I'm sneezing, coughing, and yuckify-ing everything in my house. :) I went to the doctor last week, and they thought that I had a sinus infection so they gave me antibiotics. I felt better for awhile, but I'm feeling worse again. Not so much fun...and really not a convenient time. :) Dude, I am BUSY! :) I don't have time to be sick right now. Yes, on some level I do realize how silly that sounds.

4. Work: Okay, so the job that I really liked (and still do) is going okay. But there has been a regime change in my office and I now have a new supervisor. My supervisor's name is Dale and he is someone I not only can't stand but someone I can't respect. He says foul, offensive, and sexually suggestive things CONSTANTLY. He doesn't hit on me, but he jokes about being gay all the time with other people in the office. And he does it in a way to be demeaning towards homosexuals. I guess he thinks it's funny...but since I have close friends that are gay, I really don't find it funny at all. I haven't figured out if he's a hateful person or if he's just socially stupid. For instance, I've heard him tell stories about when he slept with prostitues in VietNam. Okay...so I've been a tom-boy my whole life...and I really can hang with the guys. But I don't really want to hear my 60 year old boss talk about prostitutes that he nicknamed "Scar Belly." I don't feel that that's appropriate and I don't want to hear it! But that's not all. When he sees personal faxes for people, he throws them away. He'll come up to people on the phone and either yell in their office or literally hang up on the person they're talking to. He signs up people for mail order items without their knowledge so they get sent and charged to their houses. He thinks it's funny to steal things from people's desks and not give them back. He doesn't deal with things when they come up in a confrontational manor - instead, he chooses to talk about them behind their back with the rest of us. And he's the one that got promoted!!! It doesn't actaully say a lot about my company and who they feel are management material. I don't see me working for this company for much longer if he's the a-hole that I have to see and communicate with daily. And that's a bummer.

5. Family: My grandmother moved from Washington DC to Chicago about a month ago to be near my dad. She has dimentia and was found wandering outside her house not knowing where she was. So now she's in a home in Chicago where my dad can keep a better eye on her. A little over a week ago it seemed like she had had a small stroke because she didn't know where she was again and was having more health issues. She's now been discharged from the hospital, but the last time I talked to her and I mentioned that I would see her at Christmas, she just replied "We'll see. I probably won't be here then." So not looking good there.

So with all these things going on, I'm just a tad stressed. :)

I do miss you...even if I don't communicate as often as I should. I hope I'll have better news and be more like my happy, cheerful self the next time I blog. Until then, know that I do care...even if I don't call or write as often as I should.

:),
me

My fantasy...

...football team is called the Redheaded Stepchildren. :)

I am *very* excited about our draft tomorrow...and I'm hoping for a great season.

I even made a mascot for my team. Since I'm the only female in our league, I decided to make the mascot a female. Isn't she so cute? :)
All I have to say to the rest of the guys in my league is prepared to get beaten...like a red-headed stepchild. Come on...you *knew* that was coming!

Funny or not so funny?

I'm not trying to brag, but people seem to think I'm funny. I get a kick out of it - there's nothing like the feeling of making people laugh. Every now and again, someone will tell me that I should either do stand-up or audition for "Last Comic Standing." I gotta' tell you a couple of things:

1) I'm not that funny...really. It's just that usually my audience is drinking.

and 2) sometimes what I think is funny is not what other people think are funny. Which is really unfortunate...because when no one else thinks it's funny, I get tickled by the joke even more. Sure, it's kind of a bad cycle, but I can't seem to stop it.

So, a couple of weeks ago, this comic was emailed to me. I laughed and laughed and even put it up on the outside of my cube (I'm a giver, what can I say?). No one...and I mean NO ONE in my office thought it was funny. I, on the other hand, would laugh every time I saw it.

Since I put up a new comic every week, the people in my office politely waited until the week of that comic was up... probably hoping that it would be replaced by a Ziggy cartoon. Please note that if you do, in fact, think Ziggy cartoons are funny, I order you to stop reading now. Seriously. I can't be friends with someone like you.

Fast forward to today:

One of my friends from college (Candice Yoder...now Salmon) just had her third baby. The baby's name is Isaiah Robert. Yay Candice!

So off and on during the day I thought about this name...and in the afternoon, an AWESOME nickname came to me. I think they should nickname him iBob. You know...like iPod.

I'm thinking about his new nickname and I was cracking up. I mean, I was literally laughing out loud at my desk in my cube. I was so proud of myself! I emailed two friends...both of which did not comment on the nickname that I, quite frankly, thought was hilarious. So I decided to run it by a couple of co-workers. They thought that it was not funny. I decided to push it further and explain the joke, like:
"oh come on!

iBob...like short for Isiah Robert?

But like iPod?

Get it?

Okay, let me explain it more...it's like this..."

And even *that* didn't work. My boss (who also did not like the "Get a room" comic) said "Again, I don't want you to confuse my not laughing as that I don't get it." My co-worker, Lisa, even gave me a pity laugh... I think because she was tired of me saying "iBob...get it? like iPod?" over and over. Another co-worker said, "Well, the good news is that it's as funny as the "Get a room!" comic." I, of course, was flattered by this.

(sigh)

iBob.

That's funny...I don't care who you are.

*This* is why I would never win on "Last Comic Standing."

Awkward silence after saying something offensive? I have the solution!

Have you noticed that people are saying, "I'm just saying" after a statement as a way to get away with whatever they just said?

Examples:

"Your hair looks like it hasn't been brushed today...I'm just saying!"

"Did you get those pants from an old couch? I'm just saying..."

"I can't stand that girl. She kinda' smells like poop. I'm just saying..."

What is with that these days?

Gone are the days of apologies for saying mean things. Now we are freely admiting that we said them and offer no form of regret. Even the "I'm just saying" seems more of an afterthought...tagged on to the end of a sentence that someone else found offensive - just to kill the awkward silence.

Moreover, why are we accepting whatever that person says JUST because they add that phrase on the back end? I mean, I find that my feelings are soothed by someone adding that statement on the end...even though what they did say was a little offensive. And no, my happy fun pants have never been mistaken for old couch fabric. :)

23 Skiddoo!

Just to update you...

My life is great.

I've been flirted with, changed my hair color back to red (it just feels right!), had way too much beer, laughed so hard my sides hurt, and in general feel just peachy. Oh, and did I say I was flirted with? Nothing heals the hurt of being cheated on like someone else thinking you're attractive.

Life has a way of working itself out.

Jon and I even talked this morning and although I know that it is over for sure, somehow it felt good to not be angry anymore. I realized that I'm ready to move on. Hell, I already am moving on.

So, life is good. :)

Off to a couple of parties and bbq's....who knows what wonders await? :)

Thank you!!

What did I do to deserve a friend like you?
Friday afternoon when Jon and I broke up, my world was pretty much turned upside down. I thought that he was one of the few people that I could trust blindly. Sometimes I catch myself still shocked that he actually cheated and that he wasn't ever going to tell me. The most painful was the emotional cheating that he did...and all those bad little thoughts about ourselves that we all try so hard to suppress came flooding towards me. Because as I've found, when you're alone and wide awake at 3 a.m. it's hard to remember that it isn't you and it wasn't your fault.

I wondered if there were good, honest people out there and if people were worth trusting at all...

Your support over the last couple of days through thoughts, prayers, phone calls, emails, and comments have meant so much!

It's helped me to feel grounded. It's reminded me that there are good people who still know right from wrong. It's made me feel loved even though I am trying to release the feeling of being rejected. It's helped me realize how thankful that I am that I get to be in your lives. It's renewed my faith in the goodness of people and given me the strength to let go of some of the anger, hurt, and sadness. Even those that have offered to call or "visit" him have made me feel protected, cared for, and that it's okay to lean on people. What's more is that it's helped me remember that I will be able to trust whomever I date in the future...maybe more tentatively than in the past, but I will be able to trust again.

I doubt I'll ever know what I did to deserve friends like you. In truth, I don't think I did anything to deserve it.

You are a gift. Your friendship is a gift.

And I thank you from the bottom of my heart!

They say that breakin' up is hard to do

...but this one was pretty easy.

Jon and I broke up.

He cheated on me.

Any cards, comments, emails, flowers, statements of what a jerk he is and how much better I am to be rid of him and/or song dedications from Deliah After Dark are welcome. Seriously though, I know that you guys are thinking of me and I appreciate it. :)

I'm okay - mostly shocked...and angry. Sad will come later...I'm sure. Until then, know that I appreciate your friendship. :)

Mmmm...valves

So I just finished my second week of work at my new job...and I have to say that there is a lot more to valves and actuators than what I previously thought. :)

I can now look at a 15 digit part number and tell you what type of valve it is, what it is made out of (the body, seat, stem, and disk), what size it is, whether it has a handle, a gear or comes bare stem, and whether it has any special add-ons. Looking at a different 15 digit number, I can even tell you what actuator is on the valve, what the supply air is in psi, and whether or not it's a dual-acting or spring return actuator. I know, it may not sound too exciting, but it's progress and it's actually fun. I spent the first week learning about them and our business and this past week, I worked in the shop and actually put together the valves. Yay! :) Incidentally, if anyone knows any cool ways to get tough grease (silicone, etc.) out of my most favorite St. Pat's sweatshirt, I'd be forever in your debt.

This week in the shop has proven more educational than just learning about valves. I also now know many more words to "SexyBack" by Justin Timberlake and have been exposed to a country song called "I Want To Check You For Ticks." I'm not kidding. We also got to listen to a Spanish radio station (obviously, the workers got to fight over which stations they were listening to), but since I don't know what the words were to the songs, one could've been called "Cacahuates" for all I know.

In other news, I turn 30 this week...which is more than a little weird. At first, I thought that it would be no big deal, but as it turns out, I think it IS a big deal. :) I don't feel that weird "I'm not where I thought I would be, so I'll just sit at home and feel bad about it" but I guess I feel like I should be acting a tad more grown up...meaning, taking better care of my body and start saving for retirement, etc. But it's not all bad...I'm sure being 30 has it's perks. For starters, I think I've really started to accept who I am. Now, before I get all Oprah on you, just know that it's been a long time coming. While I may not be insanely pleased about every aspect of who I am, accepting it is a start.

I'm meeting with my realtor early this week so we can start working on selling my house...aparently several companies are expanding and transferring people to Denver, and many are looking in HR - so we're going to put it up a little sooner than what I thought. But I would love to ditch this high house payment as soon as possible...so keep your fingers crossed!

Some of you have asked about Elizabeth, so here's the update: the doctors don't think that it's cancer according to some further testing, etc. that they have done. Long story short, she'll have a biopsy on May 11th and then we'll know for sure after that. For now, it seems like it's a mass that they'll most likely remove so that it doesn't turn into anything bad.

I guess that's it! Sorry for these blogs as a way to update people - things have just felt super busy these days, so I haven't been in as good of contact as I should've. :(

Hope all is good in your world!

Just like the 4-Non Blondes Song...

What's goin' on?

Okay, okay...so I've been a tad distant lately. My only defense is that I have a lot going on these days.

About a month ago I was told that I would be moving to a different position within my company - essentially it's a lot more work for the same pay and was not a promotion. Yeah, not exactly what I was looking for. So I had to leave my dealers - that I really do like - and switch to ones who, although nice, I do not especially like. It's just not the same and it stinks. :)

Around this SAME time, I was fostering a dog through the Rocky Mountiain Great Dane Rescue. The dog, Tawny, had some medical issues that I was going to have to take her to the vet for and I asked for some flexibility in my job time that day - in fact, I really thought we were going to have to put her down. Anyway, my boss said "if it was for you or a child, I could understand. Since it's just for a dog, you'll have to take vacation time." There was another big frustration that day which re-lit my fire to find a different job/career.

So, I started taking a course through Colorado Free University (note, it is NOT free!) to try to decide what I want to do when I grow up. There was a lot of testing, but what came out of it was that my personality was not like a typical engineer. Again, not exactly what I was looking for. BUT I did get some good insight to who I am as a person and some types of things that I find interesting. Top career choices that were computer generated were a little interesting. Like one was a math teacher. I might be open to that, but I would have to completely change my wardrobe! I mean, I'd need to get long skirts and sweaters that have apples or various holiday celebrations all over them...so no.

Where am I now? Still the same job - although I've had one (and kinda' a half) interviews for a job that seems very promising. It'd be a pay cut, but also a way to get back into the technical side of things without losing my outgoing personality. :) The hiring manager seems really interested in me and the job seems like one that I'd enjoy.

The dog, Tawny, got adopted to a great lady...she's happy there. :) I've been doing other things to help the rescue out where I won't need the flexibility of my current job.

And I started going through my house to get rid of a lot of stuff...because I'm planning on moving. I'm planning on having my house on the market at the beginning of April...along with the nine million other houses in Highlands Ranch. :) Essentially, I'm going to be moving into a house that costs a lot less...debt is just icky sometimes and stuff is just stuff. I'd rather be free and happy to do what I want with my money and my job choices. I don't ever want to feel trapped again. :(

As far as stuff with Jon, things are great! We are planning on going "home" to El Paso for Easter to visit my mom and sisters. I personally think that he's brave for driving 12 hours with me in an enclosed space. :) Really, things should work out just fine...he's already met my family and they seem to really like him.

So, if I haven't really responded to you - or it's been major slow, I'm sorry. :(

I'll update you more on things as they progress!

Poop is raining from the ceiling! Poop!

Okay, so for those of you who are not familiar with "The Office," you're missing out.

It has to be one of the funniest shows I've seen and I look forward to it every week. Last night's episode was a great one. It made me laugh, it almost made me cry, and it made me want to convince someone today that I am a vampire. It would make work much more bearable.

Anyway, I found this website and I highly recommend you "Office" fans checking it out. I've laughed so hard I have literally started to cry. :)