Monday, August 10, 2009

The time I either was or wasn't beaten by a one-legged girl

Yesterday I found myself killing time on iTunes. I know, it doesn't SEEM like a bad idea, but let's just say it can get expensive quickly.

I saw that Whitney Houston is coming out with a new album and happened to click on her "Greatest Hits not delivered by Bobby Brown" album.* I used to LOVE Whitney Houston - back before the drugs. In fact, her album, "Whitney Houston," was one of my favorites when I was a kid. Technically, it was my dad's cassette tape, but that's what he gets for leaving his stuff in his home office in a locked drawer laying around the house. **

ANYway, when I was in 4th grade, our PE teacher made us pair up and do some little dance to any song we chose.*** I can't remember who my partner was (either Leah or Teresa) but I remember who it wasn't. It wasn't Robin. Robin and I were friends but she picked another girl (either Teresa or Leah) instead of me. Thus I had to beat Robin in a dance-off. Even though she only had one leg. What can I say? I'm competitive.

So it came time to pick songs and my group picked either "How Will I Know?" or "Greatest Love of All" - I can't remember which one but I know that Robin's team picked the other one. I remember that I totally wanted the song that Robin's team picked and I felt that it was unfair that they got to have it and we didn't. I'm not saying the one-legged thing played into it, I'm just saying it clearly wasn't fair.

Long story short, we danced. And whichever dance we danced, my team was clearly the best one. It was full of literal acting out of the words...and as everyone who has ever seen "Fame" knows, that is the best way to dance. I think we can all agree that my superior dancing/acting skills should've beaten Robin's team. But, I'll be honest. I don't remember which team won.

One thing is for certain: it had either Leah or Teresa on it.

* Yeah. I went there.

**After that, my dad started marking his tapes with his initials. Yes. My household was crazy thankyouverymuch.

***And actually, I'm not quite sure what that was all about. I mean, it wasn't like we got to see any other teams dance so I'm not sure if it was an extra credit type thing or if we all just danced for him individually. But if we were dancing for him individually, then where were the other kids?


JayneSees said...

I know you don't know me (I found your blog thru Kristi), but this post is HYSTERILOUS. Bravo.

JayneSees said...

I apologize that your introduction to my blog had to be so, ahem..."up close and personal," and I'd like to say that the others before it (or those that come after) aren't as bad, but let's not kid ourselves.

And no, Owen and I were not offended in the least. I too, think the one-legged girl had the unfair advantage. Haha.

Lily Fluffbottom said...

I used to come up with ice skating routines to songs from the Lion King, and then perform them on the flattop because 1) we didn't have an ice skating rink at school 2) it was recess.

I thought I was cool as shit. I don't know why every one kept laughing.

This was around the 1994 Olypmics. You know, Nancy Kerrigan and Tayna Harding? Tayna was from Oregon, so we were all kind of upset she betrayed us like that.