Yesterday morning I had my bi-annual dentist check-up.
I have gone to the same dentist for 5 years...and I love her.
I do not, however, love the hygenist. My first experience with her was six months ago (go figure). I have worked very hard to get over that visit...so I can really only recount yesterday's visit. It is strangely VERY similar to the last time.
Her: Hi there. I'm about to put sharp objects in your mouth. And also I am weird.
Me: Great to meet you. I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm tall. Maybe you could adjust the head rest thingie?
Her: Sure. I'll pretend to, but really I won't. That's why I suck. Oh, also? Did you know my nickname all through my life? It's "The Riddler."
Me: Why would that be?
Her: Oh...you'll see...
(alright the above part is a bit of an exaggeration...but the following IS what happened - no embelishment...okay, very LITTLE embelishment)
Her: So, have you done all of your holiday shopping this year?
Me: (remembering that she is "The Riddler" and trying to answer in one word answers) Yep.
Her: Wow. Great. I love Christmas. What is the present that you're most excited to give?
Me: Um...it's a long story.
Her: Oh. Okay.
COMFORTABLE SILENCE (apparently not so comfortable to her)
Her: So, are you working today or are you off?
Me: It's 7 in the morning...so yeah, I'm working today.
Her: Well, you never know! Some people just love coming in in the morning.
Her: So...do you know what the weather is going to be like this weekend?
Her: Why not?
Me: Because I'm going to be out of town. (and then I did a mental head slap for being so stupid)
Her: Oh really? Where are you going to go?
Me: El Paso.
Her: Wow. Where they make the sauce?
Me: No. (I still can't resist wanting to punch people who think that El Paso is where the salsa is made. PEOPLE WISEN UP!)
Her: Are you going for work or fun?
Her: Oh really? Are you going for just the weekend or for Christmas?
Me: Both. (Tricky, really. I'm going for the weekend, coming back, and then going home again for Christmas)
Her: I don't understand. What do you mean?
Me: It's a long story.
Her: So are you moving there?
Her: Are you moving to El Paso?
Seriously, it went like this for AN HOUR.
It's as if somehow me giving one word answers was the go-ahead she needed to ask more detailed questions. I couldn't figure out if she was just crazy, needy or possibly wanting to rob my house while I was gone.
And yes, I'm asking for a different hygenist if they have one - if not, I'm asking for recommendations for dentists.
14 hours ago