You know how you have this cool dream and you want to tell people about the dream, but then you remember that most people would rather stab their eyeball with a spork than listen to your dream? It means something to you, but it's hard to explain to everyone else? Yeah. This post is kind of like that.
Yesterday afternoon, I found myself talking to an old high school classmate. While I wouldn't have ever classified him as a "friend" we had joint friends and I'm sure that we all (as a very large group) hung out together a few times.
The conversation was a little different...mostly because we were talking about the challenges of dating people that are recently divorced. We agreed to meet up for a drink the next time he had a layover in Denver. Anyway, I found it an immense blessing. I mean, my home life was a little weird my junior and senior years of high school. So I made the unconscious decision to cope with all that stress by completely avoiding almost everyone from my home town when I moved away to college. It was a slow process, but I found it easier to forget the crap that I didn't want to think about when I wasn't reminded of how shitty life had become. Mature, I know.
The weirdest thing happened after I was off the phone with him. I guess I just realized all that had changed since I had seen him. First of all, I pay my own bills. I have bought almost all of the things I own. I have health care, that I have to pay for. I've kissed men. I've had sex. I've drank alcohol. I now sleep on a queen bed. I go to church, not because my parents make me, but because I crave spirituality and need to be reminded that salvation by grace alone is the greatest gift of all.
And all of the sudden, I realized that it's not just my ability to pick out my own cereal that makes me a grown up.
I just am a grown up.
So last night, after I set my alarm for my very adult job, and climbed into my bed made with sheets that I washed myself, I cuddled up with my pooh bear.
Even grown ups have their vices.
4 weeks ago
2 comments:
Amen, sister. Being a grown up is waaaay better than being a kid, or especially a teenager.
And I like church too.
I agree...especially the drinking and sex part. And doing everything because you want to not because you had to.
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