DDR

So yesterday, I received an email update from a free dating site that I have not been on in almost 6 months. I went to the site to read it and because of that, the site showed that I was "active." Now I've started receiving emails. FROM FREAKS.

Yikes. That's kind of very harsh to say, but also a little true.

For example, I just read an email that said "You have such pretty red hair" as the subject line. The total message in the body of the email is "Totally awesome." Alright. First, I definitely prefer this over "you have a common face" so I'll take the compliment. BUT what would be the proper response to that? "Yeah. Thanks. I grew it myself"?

So here's the thing, his profile picture is of him (he happens to be 40) playing Dance Dance Revolution. You know, the things KIDS hop on in the mall to hits from the 80s. Now, please don't get me wrong, I played that game about 5 years ago when I was tipsy at a friends house...and I'll be honest, it was fun. But um...I don't think that I'm going to be putting it on a profile picture as way to woo the opposite sex. And no, he was not doing it to be funny. Like he was completely serious. He even called it DDR in the caption.

Am I just being bitchy? Yeah...okay, maybe I am. Because I would love for the DDR guy to find a DDR girl. It's just that that's not me - I'm never going to turn to my boyfriend on the couch and say, "You know what? I'm just not spending enough time at the mall looking like a creepy child molester. Why don't we go and hang out with those teenage kids that aren't even liked by their parents. Then we can get an Orange Julius and watch the people hop on WHATEVER they hop on at Hot Dog on A Stick. All I know is that lemonade comes out of whatever they hop on. Mmmm hopped on lemonade!" *

(sigh)

The guys at work say that I'm too picky. And I don't think so. Or at least not overly so. I don't think there's anything wrong with having standards for whomever you choose to date. Because eventually, I think most of us are wanting to the dating to lead to marriage (or at least a committed relationship). And I really want to make sure that I never go through a divorce or that horrible nagging feeling like I settled. I know people like that. And nothing about that sounds like fun.

The point is, I shouldn't HAVE to settle. At least not on the big things that I have as a priority. Those things clearly being: his ability to sing all the words to "One Week" by Barenaked Ladies, his quickness in solving a Rubick's Cube, his belief that the Dallas Cowboys are the worst team ever, his ability to quote "The Princess Bride" in multiple situations, and of course, his skill at macrame.

I'm KIDDING again.

Well, except for the part about quoting "The Princess Bride."

*I don't know why they hop or what they hop on. Do you? But what I do know is that Hot Dog on A Stick has the best frickin' lemonade ever.