Monday, January 12, 2009

My mailman is dead

Okay. Technically, he's not...yet.

But my mailman is about 108 years old. And he gets pissy when we don't shovel our walkways because then it gets icy and he can slip, fall, and die. I, personally, feel for him. So I try to shovel my walkway. In fact, I even keep my shovel out there so I can do a quick scoop up so he won't have to deal with the snow. Tonight, I went out to do so and realized that my shovel IS GONE.

Someone stole my frickin' shovel off my front porch.

And now my mailman is going to die. I'm trying to believe that it's not my fault, but I can't help but feel responsible.

The weird thing is that someone shoveled my front step. What kind of frickin' WACKO place do I live where people steal shovels and but still manage to shovel your walkway?!?!? It's like passive aggressive craziness.

The thing that sucks the most is that I use the same shovel to shovel out a pathway out my back door onto the deck and to the "backyard".* That way my dog can go out the back door and completely ignore said path and then track in the snow all through the house.

To sum up: Thanks, a-hole. Thanks a lot.

*I think the term "backyard" indicates a space with grass, sod, or mulch larger than my MINI. If that is the case, I don't actually have a backyard. I have decking and a postage stamp sized poop zone.

4 comments:

Craig said...

Maybe the milkman is framing you, setting you up for some sort of milky tragedy. If you had only bought the 2% milk this wouldn't have happened.

Amy said...

That stinks. If we do not have our path to our mail box all cleared. Our mail man will not even leave the mail. Our mail box is on the street. My husband goes out and snow blows and then along comes the snow plow. Which by the way took out our mail box a few weeks ago. Our mail man was nice and left our mail on the door. I guess because we met me this Summer and he saw a baby he brought it up. I hope you hide your next shovel.

Charlie Hills said...

Do what I did. Move to Austin, TX.

Charlie Hills said...

Or send your mailman here.